Remember to Play With Your Kids

After five years and 300 interviews, Sherry Turkle, director of the Massachusetts Institute of Technology Initiative on Technology and Self, has found that children of parents who are continually online via smartphones, computers or multimedia devices often express feelings of "hurt, jealousy and competition." Turkle says, "Over and over, kids raised the same three examples of feeling hurt and not wanting to show it when their mom or dad would be on their devices instead of paying attention to them: at meals, during pickup after either school or an extracurricular activity, and during sports events." 
 
[nytimes.com, 6/9/10]

 

The Talent of Doublespeaking

I am so talented.

I have the ability to talk out of both sides of my mouth.

Can you do that too?

As I look within my heart to identify this problem, I am noticing a trend.  I don't really do it out in the general, meaning I feel free to be honest and truthful over "public" issues or items.  The problem is much deeper than that.

I am finding that I doublespeak to and about those closest to me...

my kids

my wife

my Savior

In doing so I make a mockery of both them and myself.  

So on this day, I am thankful for the grace of Christ that covers both the praise and the profane.

Family Worship Guide for Easter

 

From Ministry to Children


Here is a simple devotional guide to help families worship Christ together during Easter time. It might be ideal for Saturday evening before Resurrection Sunday. Family Worship is the regular and intentional assembling as a family unit to worship God by reading scripture, praying and singing praise. This brief worksheet will help you lead your family in a short time of devotion on Saturday. Children should be involved as much as their age allows. This devotions should last between 15-25 minutes.

Step 1: Gather the family

If this is a new experience for your family, keep it very simple. Have the whole family gather in the living room together. Even the very young children should participate. Turn off any radios or televisions that might be distractions.

Step 2: Read scripture

If your children are confident readers, ask them to read portions of scripture from their bibles. Prepare in advance to explain any difficult words.

• Read Mark 15:33-47: Discuss v.35 where Jesus says to God “why have you forsaken me?” Explain this was Jesus quoting Psalm 22, which foretold what would happen to the Christ. As Jesus took on our sins, he suffered the great punishment in our place. He became our substitute and took what we deserved.
• Read 1 Corinthians 15:3-8: Discuss the central elements to the Easter story. (Died, buried, raised, appeared to witnesses).  Discuss the importance of the phrase “according to the scriptures.” Explain that Jesus’ death was predicted and promised in the Hebrew Bible. Discuss the importance of Jesus appearing to many witnesses. Explain this was a real historical event, not something imaginary. Many real people saw it.

Step 3: Pray

Lead the family in a time of prayer. Include elements of Praise, Thanksgiving, Confession and Requests. The pray time should focus on the passages you have just read and be a response of worship to God.

Step 4: Sing

Select a song that is familiar to your family. Using a worship CD may be helpful. Many families prefer to sing without background music. Choose songs that remind you of the cross and resurrection of Jesus.  Sojourn Kids has posted some wonderful original music you can use. “The Cross Is Not The End” and “God’s Love Goes On Forever

What Do You Want to Be Known For?

Earlier in 2010, there was a mass gathering of people in Vancouver BC, Canada for the Winter Olympic Games. All for the purpose of celebrating diversity in sports and the spirit of human ability. Hundreds of people entered to be the best in their sport category. Many played, few won. Medals were handed out and records were broken.

In November of 2009, the team from Guinness World Records organization decided it would be good to hold a "World Records Day," encouraging people all over the world to set their own records. You can see some of them by clicking here (viewer discretion is advised).

This one in particular, I thought was a little funny.

Joel Waul, 27, stands on top of his rubber band ball on the driveway of his home in Lauderhill, Fla., Friday, Oct. 23, 2009. Waul, a 27-year-old who works nights restocking a Gap clothing store, has spent the last six years carefully wrapping and linking and stretching rubber bands of various sizes into the ball shape. The Guinness Book of World Records declared it the world's largest rubber band ball in 2008. (AP Photo/Alan Diaz)

Now, I don't want you to hear me saying that celebrating great feats of mankind should not be celebrated. I most definitely think we should. My family, like many others sat glued to our TV sets watching many of the past winter games. It was thrilling.

Even some of the recent Guinness World Records are creative, fun, exciting and thrilling - and need to be celebrated as well.

But my question or rather the reason for this post is what about you? What do you want to be known for?
Ski jumping?
Largest ball of yarn?
A messy home?
The husband of a frazzled wife?
The father of a family that is disconnected from the Word?

Men, I want to challenge you to step up and be the man that God has created you to be. No more slacking off. Today is the day. God has created us as federal heads of our homes. Let's take that label with gusto.
For our wives.
For our children.
For the church.
For the glory of Christ.

1 Corinthians 9:24 "Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it.”

Family Worship/Devotions

For years, Mary and I have struggled (struggled may be too harsh of a word here) with how to lead our family in worship. At home. Together. The eight of us.

Some families have designated time together, perhaps at the breakfast table, dinner table, in the late evening when all are in the house. I don't believe the time nor the setting is important, as much as just doing it is.

I think some families really try to utilize Sunday morning as a time for this as well. Sometimes that just doesn't work. It's hard enough trying to get everyone's hair combed, braided, brushed; teeth brushed; matching socks; cereal inhaled; coffee drunk--who has time for family devotions/worship on a Sunday morning.

Again the goal is to not be ridged, but to really enjoy your family as you talk about God. Seek His presence. Magnify His name. Pray.

With that in mind, I would like to make a few suggestions that may help you get a start on the right foot.

1. Start with the Bible. It's the one primary source for family worship/devotions. You may use other resources, but let me tell you, all other items must point you and your family back to the Bible. We are supposed to be people of the Word and without the Word in our lives on a regular basis, we will find ourselves empty.
2. Some recent books have been written that deal with family worship/devotions. I have utilized some of these and would highly recommend them to you. First one is Training Hearts, Teaching Minds, by Starr Meade. Mary and I have used this book for a number of years. It was well written and good for families with smaller children. A few other books on raising Godly children are: Shepherding a Child's Heart by Tedd Tripp, Stand Fast by Doug Bond, Standing on the Promises and Future Men both by Doug Wilson.
3. One of the hardest to find is music. We all like different styles, tempos, arrangements. So rather than saying what I use, I will just list some web sites that would be great resources for family worship. In fact some of these I even use in my private worship times. In no particular order -- Sovereign Grace Music - great contemporary music with a heart for the exalted Christ at it's core. Indelible Grace - hymns with the melody rewritten in more of a singer/songwriter style. Birthed out of the RUF ministry these songs have been making great strides on university campus' world wide. Red Mountain Music - worship music featured from Red Mountain Church in Birmingham Alabama. PAGE CXVI - ancient words with modern music, all of them being hymns. Seeds Family Worship - these guys have been putting music to Scripture for a few years now Sojourn Music - This is one resource that I have just discovered and have thoroughly enjoyed. Even my kids have loved it. Basic concept of Sojourn Music is that they take various lyrics from hymns and utilizing their themes rewriting the music. Great stuff as I have posted before.

In closing, I would like to bring a reminder from Proverbs 22:6 --
"Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it."

Interview with Paul Tripp on Community

Jason Dooley passed me this recent post from Finding Grace. I thought it to be a great read and well worth all of our time reading it.

Abraham Piper interviewed Paul Tripp over at Desiring God. Paul was asked, “What is the greatest hinderance to cultivating community in the American church?” Here is some of Paul’s answer:

“The first thing that comes to mind is frenetic western-culture busyness.
I read a book on stress a few years back, and the author made a side comment that I thought was so insightful. He said that the highest value of materialistic western culture is not possessing. It’s actually acquiring.

If you’re a go-getter you never stop. And so the guy who is lavishly successful doesn’t quit, because there are greater levels of success. “My house could be bigger, I could drive better cars, I could have more power, I could have more money.”

And so we’ve bought an unbiblical definition of the good life of success. Our kids have to be skilled at three sports and play four musical instruments, and our house has to be lavish by whatever standard. And all of that stuff is eating time, eating energy, eating money. And it doesn’t promote community.

I think often that even the programs of a local church are too sectored and too busy. As if we’re trying to program godliness. And so the family is actually never together because they’re all in demographic groupings. Where do we have time where we are pursuing relationships with one another, living with one another, praying with one another, talking with one another?”

I wish that Paul would have specifically defined the word, “community.” I think the community that he and Piper are speaking about is almost a sort of bygone tradition. It’s the kind of community with face-to-face interaction, family meals around the dinner table, and quiet time spent in the presence of others. Our culture might define “community” as Facebook, blogging, e-mail, and 3-mintue cell phone conversations while driving in the car. We’ve become very adept at creating the illusion of community.
Paul continues…

“I’ve talked to a lot of families who literally think it’s a victory to have 3 or 4 meals all together with one another in a week, because they’re so busy. Well, if in that family unit they’re not experiencing community, there’s no hope of them experiencing it outside of that family unit.

You can’t fit God’s dream (if I can use that language) for his church inside of the American dream and have it work. It’s a radically different lifestyle. It just won’t squeeze into the available spaces of the time and energy that’s left over.”

One thing I’ve been learning more about in the past few months (aside from my “broken record” about living out of a posture of desperation) is that I have limitations. I am a human being, and by nature, I must conduct life within a certain set of physical limitations. I have a limited amount of energy. I have a limited amount of material resources. I have a limited amount of time. And I have a limited amount of power. That last one is hard to admit. I don’t think our secular culture would agree. “They” would say (and have said, many times): “You create your own destiny. You can do anything, if you put your mind to it.” But I’m not buying it.

It seems that the voices around us tell us over and over, “You’re here to be productive. You’re only worth something unless you’re producing.” And productive people have to be busy people, right?

Paul concludes…

“So we’ve just been confronted with how all of those things that aren’t evil in themselves become the complications of life that keep us away from the kind of community that we need in order to hold on to our identity.”

It’s ironic that I try to find my identity apart from my intended design. I was designed, by God, to live in relationship. I wasn’t called or destined to create an identity for myself, based on what I do. My identity is based on who I am: a child of God, and a member of God’s family.

So my thought is how do we participate more in our small group? Are we so busy in our lives that we forget to share our struggles, passions, love of the Savior, confessions, problems, praises, etc. with each other?

Let us pursue each other by pursuing Christ above all.

How Sweet the Sound

Did someone say free music?

I did.

I am not sure if you noticed on the blog here, but there is a widget posted from Covenant Life Church in Maryland. They have put together a collection of hymns for their congregation to learn. They are taking 10 hymns and spreading them across 10 months - one per month. They all want to learn them so that they can sing them together.

I encourage you do download these songs. You may pay if you would like (any amount) or download them for free. Then share these songs with your family. Sing them at the breakfast table, at the dinner table. As you work together. Take the time to be in worship together.

I have attached the widget in this post as well.